Narcotic Aphasia

Walking away from dawn with a barren soul at hand,
A fixation on the face and a disease within that shallow man,
Passing one stranger after another with hypocrisy on their lips,
Misguided anger and confusion breeding on his finger-tips.

With each abuse he sets his mind free,
With each breath he questions what he might not be,
With each flick he concentrates his halting time,
On the life ploughed around him,
By the past and present of his future crimes.

The nausea infected Prozac soothing him within,
Nourishing his thoughts and penetrating his skin,
This lyre seeps out
as a revolt against his polluted convictions,
This thought provoking hallucinogen
places him within his own horrid execution.

To write under the influence of these intoxicated words,
To analyze his being as fatal and disturbed,
To suffocate out from his mind these intoxicated pleas,
Is for him not to be sober to know what i really be.

[Cluster V]

Still 550 deeds to awe

You probably won't get the context if you haven't played Quest For Glory V ;)

81 seasons and 15 moons* before,
A sin was created to live for a few seasons more,
That year of the serpent pried loose Iblis from his shackles,
A child born off a woman pure, into the form of a jackal.

He bears the mark of the fallen one,
Addicted to addictions against the Holy one,
He who bears the mark of the broken cross,
Is condemned to father the offspring of Lucifer and the wrath of God.

Be it his fear that keeps him tormented in twilight,
Or be it his plight that keeps him only half-pure,
A traitor to his personally concocted darkness,
Uttering an orison of his own proudly fictitious shores.

This fallen one condemns himself,
To a contradiction of his foul words,
This precious sinner recollects himself,
As more than a dark soldier with a misery ridden soul.

This fallen one corrects himself,
When he urges in spirit to defy God's rite,
This silver-tongued thief dawns again himself,
For he is more than only these incomplete words.

* 20 years, 3 months and 15 days

[Cluster V]

Hole

Sometimes i think when I'm all alone, 
What's for real and what's for sale,
The reality i seek, the defense it holds,
It's insignificant passing and it's trivial role.

To cushion my fall to harsh reality,
To buffer the shock of my after taste,
To keep me suffocating and away from harm's reach,
Look for me there, stay a while and share in my peace.

Yes, we can both share my hollow little hole,
Six-feet underground, away from society's
air-thinning cauterizing code,
If i could shift my weight and let you breathe again,
Would it have meaning in your isolated world?

On a plain field of burrows,
There be plenty of such little holes,
Each made by someone for someone else
as the cliche goes,
So what else have i laid in claim for you?
Other than a peace in the desolate, hollow ground,
My cliche for you through my words
which be so falsely profound.

So would you give in to the idea of me?
And look past my concealed imperfections
for a lifetime or more,
So would you still reveal yourself to me?
After you've seen through my eyes at the
true reflection i hold?
After all this would you still want to stare
at the demon in me?
Or would you just clench your fist to shatter all that
you can and cannot see?

But if i still be your strength to foster,
will you pick up the pieces after you've emerged?
Or will you turn to walk away bare-footed?
To another one of those hollow little holes...

[Cluster V]

What breaks me inside

Why do we talk with cryptic words? Wander aimlessly around a thought absurd, Far from isolation we have no retreat, One stretching time, the other chiseling it incomplete. Although inside i feel myself break for you, I cannot thrive on your confusion alone, There is a restraint on time and my strength itself, Worn down thin by the seclusion I've felt. In my mind, i don't think we belong, In my mind, i don't think we ever did, In my mind, we were fooled by what we believed in, In my mind, i know its already too late. I feel torn apart    while my eyes are drenched in this fate, Now that i know    we cant escape from this unscathed. [Cluster V]

Muriel

Blocked Inspirations

*
Injured highs of a holy creation,
Martyred worth of misconceived origins,
The fears you believe in, your one dimensional fall,
Can only be as true as the writing on your walls.

*
I be content with the imperfection that you see,
In yourself is the reason for my soul's desired lunacy,
That is my nature which i ask off you to accept,
With no questions asked but just the belief in yourself.

*
Watch minor acquaintances turn to foes,
Watch the demons let loose on thy soul,
Watch out...

[Cluster V]

My peace to myself

The warz of my ideologies,
Contradicted by paradigms of creation,
Argued human nature or just lame excuses?
Questions like these sold on the streets,
For nickles, dimes, spare change but nothing concrete.

How can you prove me wrong?
When you're just as lost as i am,
What makes you the one to dictate?
What my mind should believe as pure or fake,
Don't you stare out through your own conceptions?
Believe in your own lies and indulge in your deceptions?
So what makes you higher than me?
Is it your narcissism or your forefathers' vanity?

Why cant you just learn to live with my ways?
Disappear from my world and take away your dismay,
All I've ever asked of you is to let me be,
Mildly put, 'Fuck off' and set my singed mind free.

[Cluster V]

Little Intrusions

I was interrupted while writing this so i left it incomplete.

Slouching next to absolute completion,
With muffled words that deny their creation,
The doubt of your own worth hollows me within,
Deepens my void and clouds my reasoning...

[Cluster V]

Beneathe my silence

Manipulated words from the lord of deceit,
Eradicated composure through which i conceive,
The paralysis of my being, the silence of my screams,
A paradoxical son of a bitch spawning within me.

Stranded at the crossroads of my own lunacy,
With each fork prophesying some form of misery,
Nemesis to contentment, advocate to change,
I've grown weary and my life's worth drained.

Someone claimed my being and never turned to see,
The seizures i was left with harvested within me,
I loathe myself for raising this demon within,
Reducing something so pure to a wicked conspiracy.

If i could break in and show you myself,
My mind at ease, my soul at rest,
Would you turn away and decide to move on?
But would you first free me and embrace my scorn?

[Cluster V]

Venom

The fault in our reason,
The conformity within our treason,
Decibles of hate deafening our senses,
Crucified individuality, living on a wretched consensus.

We think not with our minds of clay,
Born to follow what our leaders say,
Forked tongues in twisted mouths,
For change, we have nothing but time.

Borrowed words that expose the faults,
Of a wasteland claimed by human drought,
The narcissim of our race reigning supereme,
Nauseous aversion to purity infecting our dreams.

Why was i born as a pawn in this creed?
Surrounded by deciet, self-destruction and greed,
Could i have not been born as a rock?
Stonned to numbness by these artifical faults.

[Cluster V]